4.

When Ezra came along, we became a family of 4.

I had so many questions. How am I going to survive without sleep again? How will Stella make it thru this? How are we going to afford this and our adoption payments? Will Brandon and I ever be able to hang out alone again? What will this mean for our adoption? The list goes on!

I'll never forget pulling out of the driveway to go to the hospital. Stella stood at the window crying. Ahhhhhhh! What a terrible feeling. I was so concerned about her and scared about the c-section. There are many beautiful things about having a baby but there are also a lot of unknown and scary things. I'm about to be cut open and a baby pulled out. I remember praying in the car....for Stella, myself, Ezra and then becoming completely overwhelmed.

A few hours after Ezra was born, my mom brought Stella to the hospital to meet him. She didn't say much and stood around biting her fingernails. She gave him a gift and offered to open it for him since his 'arms were too short' and then asked if he could go live with another family now:) We explained that he would be living with us forever and she thought that it would be cool if he could go back into my belly!

In her defense, this was not the beautiful little Ethiopian sis that we had been praying for. It must have been confusing for her. The first month was a blur. I barely remember these days. Really. I do remember feeling guilty that I couldn't spend more time with Stella and like I was holding and/ nursing this baby boy 24 hours a day. Thankfully some sweet people (Tyler, Julie, Devon, Wes, The Howvers, The Novellis, Brandy, Kate and others) took Stella on some play dates. This helped so much! It gave her something fun to look forward to and allowed me to rest physically and mentally. Also-some amazing people in our lives brought meals for a couple of weeks. Best 2 things ever!!! (Thanks Wendy for organizing the meals and for all of you who fed the Grissoms during this life changing time). I am so so so thankful for our friends and family.

Anyway, it took Stella awhile to get warmed up to her baby bro. In fact, I just asked Brandon when he thought that she really started like him. His answer was....Christmas time:) Stella ADORES Ezra and doesn't like to go anywhere without him. She is really patient and helpful with her baby brother who she calls Ez, brother bear or Ezra pants. I know that having him around adds joy and character to all of our lives. I love our new little addition (who will be 10 months old in a few days) and of course I love my little Stella. She is the answer to a lot of tears and prayers and will forever be my miracle girl.

Thank you God for knowing what is best for our family and for shaking things up a bit.

Starting over

A new year. A new blog.

I have clearly done a terrible job keeping up with this and so much has happened in our lives.

A little more than a year ago, Brandon and I got the biggest surprise we've ever had! After years of dreaming about adoption and a full year of actively pursuing this, we found out that we were pregnant. Shocking! It is a miracle that we got pregnant (details not to be shared on the web) but clearly, this was not part of the Grissom plan. I was instantly vomiting and cried tears of sadness and confusion. I was not only worried about the pregnancy because of our complicated history but afraid that it would slow down the adoption process. I had been dreaming of meeting my daughter in Ethiopia and this was.....terrifying. I felt like a total idiot. I mean, I've heard about people getting pregnant during the adoption process but I've never actually met anyone. Seriously, I felt like a moron. Plus, we were making huge payments toward the adoption that would now be put 'on hold'.

I clearly remember being 16 weeks pregnant (still vomiting!) and thanking God for this pregnancy for the first time. I am embarrassed to write this but it is the truth. After fertility treatments and loss, I know how precious a pregnancy is and that adds to my embarrassment.

Two weeks later I was having some complications and had to go into the doctors office. I had an ultrasound and when the tech asked if I wanted to know the sex of the baby...I said yes! Even though Brandon wasn't with me, there was no way I could wait. He understands this about me:) When she told me that we were having a boy, I started giggling like a little girl. I don't know what came over me. I had never really wanted to be pregnant again or have a boy but this was so exciting. I left the doctors office and called Brandon about 4,000 times until he answered. I then made about 20 other phone calls to notify everyone else because this kind of news can't wait!

Then...I started to worry. When I was pregnant with Stella, I did the thing that a new mom should never do. I bought/registered for EVERYTHING in pink! For real. I had about 2 items that could be used for this baby but as always, God provides. Because of great friends and a beautiful shower, our little baby boy has everything he needs.

My pregnancy was relatively calm. I mean, I was sick/tired/hormonal/huge but no bed rest needed. Thank you God for answering prayers.

Ezra Kent Grissom was born on April 19 at 37 weeks. He weighed 8 pounds 2 ounces and the first remark made by the doctor was about how big he was:) Brandon and I were completely in AWE at how smooth this pregnancy and childbirth had gone.

We had the hardest time choosing a name. I created list after list. We texted each other name ideas...prayed....read books...and searched movie credits for something that stood out. We loved the name Ezra but hesitated because of terrible reviews from friends and family. We also liked Garrett. Brandon might say that Hank was on the list but it wasn't:) When we arrived at the hospital for the c-section (I was already in labor) we had no idea what we would name this baby. At some point late at night, we officially named him Ezra Kent and felt great about it. He is named after Brandon's Papa Kent who we highly respect.

I ADORE my little boy and from the moment he entered the world he has known my voice. He is a delightful little chunk and I can't believe he is already 8 months old.

I write this mostly for myself as I doubt that many friends/family will even see this. I'm not a great writer but it's so good to reflect. We have a lot to celebrate. 2010 turned out completely different than we had planned and I am so glad. God is good to us.

I'll have to post later about how our sweet little Stella has adjusted to being a big sis and where are hearts are with adoption.

way too long...

It's been way too long since i've updated my blog. Sorry! It's been a busy few months. We are about a week away from delivering our little boy and we will be a family of 4! We haven't decided on a name yet so i'll keep you posted. This has been an ongoing debate in our house for months. If it were up to Brandon, this little boy would be named Hank Grissom...or Rocco or Gus....or Roger:) We have a long list of possible names and Brandon has an even longer list of unique names that he likes!

Stella is about to be 3 1/2 and is as sweet and sassy as ever. She is very talkative and excited to become a big sister! She can't wait for the baby to be born so that she can go buy him a Spiderman toy! I think she will be a great sister.

Here are some recent pics of her.....

Stella-Easter 2010

Stella-Valentines Day 2010

Stella @ Caitlins Wedding (it was a BEAUTIFUL wedding and so special for our entire family to be involved).

Santa.

Yesterday, we went out for breakfast and then to see Santa. Stella almost backed out several times but after an hour of waiting-she had the courage to go speak to Santa:)

She gave him a very long list of random items....like a trumpet and a telescope and was so proud of herself when it was all over! Very sweet.

Merry Christmas!

The most wonderful time...

Our family has had a few days off together and i'm SO thankful! Christmas time with a 3 year is really special and her excitement about the holiday is incredibly sweet.

Stella has loved decorating cookies, handing them out to neighbors, going 'sleighing', drinking hot chocolate, and helping daddy shovel the snow. Everything is so exciting for her! Especially the Christmas lights and holiday cartoons (her favorite is How the Grinch Stole Christmas). Here are just a few pics from the weekend.

Her 1st Snowman.

Working on Christmas cards.

Getting gifts from Uncle Ty Ty and Aunt Ju Ju.

And giving gifts to Uncle Ty Ty and Aunt Ju Ju. She was so excited that she told them what it was before they had a chance to open it:)

We are looking forward to a simple holiday and making lots of memories together. Tomorrow-we go see Santa. Stella doesn't really want to.....she thinks he's a 'little scary'....so i'll keep you posted:) I would love a picture this year. Last year, it ended up being just Santa and I in a blur because Stella was running away. We didn't buy it but luckily Brandon had his phone handy and snapped a crappy shot. Hopefully we'll do better this year!

It's been so long!

It's been so long since i've updated my blog! It is my goal to do this more often:) So much has happened over the last 2 months.....it's hard to know where to start!

So-I'll start off slow, with some pictures to hi-light a few of the special things we've been doing lately.

1. Stella turns 3! All I can say is that 3......is way different than 2! She is vocal....intelligent....emotional...and completely adorable. I feel like i'm dealing with a kid instead of a baby. She is hilarious and I tell her that she's my favorite on a regular basis.

2. Stella dressed up like a princess for Halloween again this year. She wears a tiara on a daily basis so I guess it was the best choice and I didn't have to purchase a costume! She didn't like the masks/scary stuff this year so we stayed inside most of the day, but she does LOVE one thing about Halloween.......CANDY CORN.

3. Our good friend Scott Bartlow celebrated his birthday and hosted a 2o's themed murder mystery party. So fun! I'm not sure what my face is doing.....but it was a lot of fun!

4. And a special one-Brandon hasn't even seen this picture yet:) Tonight he fell asleep with Stella and I came in and snapped this picture. He is on vacation this week and we are so happy about it!
More updates to come.

Happy Thanksgiving everyone.

sad day.

today, patrick swayze dies at the age of 57.

growing up, patrick swayze was always my favorite. i have vivid memories of acting out dance scenes from the movie dirty dancing with my girlfriends and trying to do 'the lift'. i have loved so many of his movies (some pics below).

msnbc writes:
Patrick Swayze, the hunky actor who danced his way into viewers’ hearts with “Dirty Dancing” and then broke them with “Ghost,” died Monday after a battle with pancreatic cancer. He was 57.
“Patrick Swayze passed away peacefully today with family at his side after facing the challenges of his illness for the last 20 months,” said a statement released Monday evening by his publicist, Annett Wolf. No other details were given.
Fans of the actor were saddened to learn in March 2008 that Swayze was suffering from a particularly deadly form of cancer.